Look who showed up for the Holidays

Brac's super cool father-in-law finished these for the family. This is the pic Brac sent to me but I thought it was pretty cool and I wanted to share with you guys.

And, DC, that's a good idea with Bane's ol' computer, but it is going to stay with Mrs. Bane and if I wasn't such a forgetful dork my computer would be up and running as we speak. Long story short I left the windows copy Brac sent me at the in-laws and now they have to mail it back up to me. Doh. And, Brac being the Mad Genius that he is still in process of gutting all of Banes old computers for any Bane residue. Oh, and Brac, take your time with that. I know I have a small pile of Dad's writing that I need to get to looming at me from a corner in my bedroom, and quite often it's just easier to leave it alone for 'one more day'.

Well, I'll be back on track soon. Sorry for leaving you all hanging. I'll hop on Husbands fancy new computer until I get mine back. But I kind of feel like laptops are like your favorite pair of underwear... I prefer my own funk to his. I feel like I'm scratching his balls for him right now just using his keyboard. I'm sure he wouldn't mind, but I have long nails that I don't like to have to clean out...

On that note, HAPPY NEW YEAR!! Ya bastards.
Bless you all.

Broken down...

Yep. The ol' computer crashed. Thank goodness for iPhones or I would be completely out of touch. Bractoon's getting me back on track, then maybe I'll write something of quality. Psh. We'll see.

Ok, typing on my phone makes my colon quiver.

Too bad.

Hey, Dad.

I just went to see the Punisher today with your youngest Marine. Very early in the movie I was holding back tears because all I could think about was how much you would have loved this one. But, don't worry, that didn't last long because the movie was so well done that I was quickly distracted by the next scene.

They did a really good job: the violence was very violent, the humor was indeed amusing, and the actor nailed it. I wish I could have driven down and taken you to see it... but... that's what you get for not being here. I hope you're doing well where ever you are. Hell, for all I know you were sitting with us in the theater. That would be creepy. But kind of cool.

I miss you, dad.

1,000 Times, Thank You

To all of you who might stop by here that gave to my younger brother and sister for Christmas: I can't thank you enough for your generosity to this family.

I got a call from my step-mom last week asking for my help with getting the younger kids a Christmas present. There's a little background story for this one. Three months ago, right after our dad died we had my step-mom, Johnny and Natty up to my in-laws house. Their home is large and cozy and they have a great big game room with a Nintendo Wii, X-box, Playstation and blah blah blah. I had been spending time in the living room talking with the moms and Natty when I decided to go upstairs and check on Johnny. I stood in the doorway of the playroom and observed quietly behind him as he played Mario kart on the Wii. He was able to hold the remote and navigate his little go-kart all over the place with ease. His hands are still deformed and it can be somewhat difficult for him to do things that require dexterity or pushing small buttons on a game console. But with the Wii he was able to just hold the damn thing on the sides and twist and turn it and have a blast.

I hollered downstairs to the Banewife to come check out how well Johnny was playing and she, too, was thrilled to see him playing a video game. The two kids have never had a gaming system their whole lives. So, when Banewife called me last week, she asked me to shop for a Wii for the kids because she knows I own one and she wants to make sure they get all the right equipment for it. She also wants it to be a surprise and it's too difficult for her to round up a babysitter to go out and get a present. The Wii will be completely paid for by Bane readers, and that is the coolest thing ever. I've been shopping on Post and Costco trying to find out where I can get the best price to maximize this gift and get them the most games. The PX has the best price right now but they have no Wii's in stock, so please pray that I can get my pregnant ass out there on a day that they get new stock.

This is really fun for me, and it's exciting for the kids. Also, please pray for Natty, she has really been having a hard time with grief. She's been seeing a counselor and she talks with Banewife all the time. But she's just in a rut. Johnny understands the devastation, but he seems to put it aside a lot more. Whether that's part of his disability or not, I'm not sure.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Symbology

'Ssssssymbolism, I believe the word you're looking for is symbolism.'

Husband and I went out and got a tree on Saturday. Afterward we came home and he drank beer while decorating the outside of the house standing on a wobbly kitchen chair and I put lights up in our windows. We were going to decorate the house while Gremlin slept and then do the tree as a family. Well, we were too tired on Sunday, Monday I went to the concert, and last night Husband went to the field. Now I have this completely bare 'evergreen' in my house and it already looks like it's starting to die.

I love Christmas. I love decorating. I don't know where I got it from, either. My dad always said that Christians are such hypocrites for celebrating Christmas, especially with the tree being an old Druid thing. My mom always scheduled herself to work on Christmas eve and day so that she could make more money. I'm just a sucker for shiny lights, I guess.

The past two Christmas' Husband and I were in transition and didn't even have a home to celebrate it. The first time we were moving down to Georgia, the second time we were moving away from Georgia. This time we're settled but Husband is in the field and I've got a dying tree in my kitchen. It's a really big kitchen, and that way Gremlin can't get to it. Maybe God is trying to tell me that Christmas really is bullshit.

Sappy Cat Blogging

In response to Sparrow's recent post:



I was thinking about how awesome my cats are. They are both about 15 pounds and they've learned to tolerate anything and if they want to play rough they can go learn to fend for themselves in the forest. We've never played rough with our cats and they're both about three years old. The first cat (black & white) our friend who worked on a farm in Oregon asked us to hold onto for a night. They found him stuck in a feeding tube in a barn and my friends adult cat was trying to eat the tiny kitten when they took him home. She had placed him in a bucket outside until she could find somewhere else for him. He was so little I had to cut the front off of a cheeze-it box to turn it into a litter box. He fit in the palm of my hand at the time. Now he lays down on the floor and lets Gremlin crawl over his fat belly and poke his eyes and pull his ears. I watched him carefully for a long time, I wasn't sure if he would hurt the baby, but he almost seems like her guardian at times. That probably sounds gay, but he really does seem to love her.

I adopted the other cat to surprise my husband. He grew up with a tabby and had always wanted another one. He's more of a pussy (lol?) but we love him anyways. Sorry you had some bad experiences, Sparrow. But there are some good one's out there. And dogs eat their own poop.

...I guess I have seen my cat eat it's own vomit, but in it's defense it was only cleaning up it's mess. Good kitty.

Prodigal Blogger

Sorry I've been so sparse lately. Haven't felt like writing, wah. We went and saw Metallica on Monday and it was amazing. They played lots of old shit and they played well. I was a little concerned that the vocals were getting old, but they exceeded any and all of my expectations. God this is bland writing...

The fuckhead-rednecks sitting right next to me were smoking weed the whole time. The dude directly to my right was so fat and stoned that every time they played a new song he would, well, I guess you would call it head bang? Only it looked more like a walrus trying to have sex with itself, awkwardly hunching and flopping and not really getting anywhere. The one moment when James Hetfield was kind of taking a break and talking to the audience (I love to hear that shit) fat-head-redneck decided that was a good time to yell in my ear how much he loved Metallica. I wanted to say 'No shit mutherfucker! That's why we're all here right now!'. But instead I cast him an annoyed glance and tried to look real interested in what James was saying. It wasn't until after the show that my brother laughed about how he had a big fucking knife in his pocket the whole time, and when he went outside to smoke six times they never caught it in security. Ah well, even if I did stab the idiot he wouldn't have noticed, it'd be like sticking a toothpick through the frosting on a cupcake. Eat a damn salad.

I will be trying to hit up every show of theirs I possibly can in the future. This has eased my concerns that they're getting too old to rock. I don't know what I was thinking. They've got those songs down so well on muscle memory that they could play while having a stroke and shitting in their diapers.

Long live metal.

Lamb of God and The Sword sucked harder than a hooker with a gun to her head.